Quick, to the slutcave!
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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