If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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