omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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