Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
We need to get me chipped asap
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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