guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
