Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize