You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
