Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry julytitan hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(765): View more from Indiana

that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming

Fav 2 2227 766
share tweet
(513): View more from Ohio

no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.

Fav 17 2083 2783
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(585): View more from New York

My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.

Fav 6 1060 4141
share tweet
(613): View more from Ontario

Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.

Fav 1 3106 1278
share tweet
(818): View more from California

I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.

Fav 15 1348 3562
share tweet
(+64): View more from New Zealand

If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine

Fav 6 3102 1732
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture

Fav 13 1756 685
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(512): View more from Texas

I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.

Fav 2 450 792
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(937): View more from Ohio

His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time

Fav 0 38 63
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT