all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
