No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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