whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
