You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
