I think im going to throw up on grandma
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
