i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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