Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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