just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize