it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
If its not for food we ain't going out.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize