party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
