thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
