just tell him i said nine months
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
