Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
