so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
