He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize