my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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