I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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