the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize