But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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