..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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