i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
handjob tips. give me some.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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