What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
im on a boat
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