For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
