I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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