i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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