have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
My ass is underappreciated
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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