You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize