How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
It's official drugs can't kill me
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
