It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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