well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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