I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I just forgot I was standing up.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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