I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
