wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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