I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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