He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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