I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
