Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
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