if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
