love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
