i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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