when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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