ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
The beers last night were like the tears from god
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
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