i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
